Duece

Felix 1 - Nurses 1

Do you remember my last blog post I'm my own doctor? I had just managed to score a point against the nurses by removing my cannula, increased my feeds and started to wear clothes. I was very proud of myself. I could move my hands all over my face without pieces of plastic prodding me, hold my parents fingers on both hands and grab onto my feeding tube when it irritated me. More on that subject later. The last picture I had that day was when I was looking like this.

 

Cute eh ? I think so. Look at me sucking my fingers unobstructed!

I would have thought that the nurses would have been happy to see this but, I have a feeling my blog is being read by the people on the inside. "Felix 1 - Nurses 0" - news travels fast. Nobody likes to lose do they, especially to somebody 1/50 their size. I would like to say that I was shocked by the hospitals next move, but I would be lying. After all, all is fair in love and war.

The hospital staff returned when I least expected them, my parents had just put me down after cuddles and I noticed a blue figure walking towards me. A single blue figure. 1 vs. 1. Bring it on. She picked up my wrists and placed a light underneath, illuminating my flesh in the process. She pulled out a sharp pointing thing and inserted it into my hand. I wasn't giving up blood that easy nursey! I don't know how, but I wasn't. Another blue figure approached. 2 vs 1. Unfair by anybodies books. This nurse held my hand whilst the first tried harder to get my blood. No way. Not in my incubator. Wait?! That's my Mum holding my head?! I was shocked, I fixed my glare onto her and stared at her in disgust - she didn't like this so swapped with my Dad. I stared at my Dad in disgust - he just belittled me "Come on little man, just give the Nurses your blood!"       4 vs 1. What a joke! I started losing it at this point, what were they all thinking? I shrieked over and over again until something was put into my mouth, it tasted so nice, sweet sugary water, sweet sugary water, sweet....sugary......water.......PAIN! Aaaargh, I shall not surrender - you can not pacify me!!!

One big person walked away 3 vs 1. Another followed 2 vs 1. Just my parents left now. They kissed me and said "sorry". Forgiven. They left the room 1 vs 0? I had won! No blood given and against those odds? Who would have thought.

10 minutes later I saw another figure approach. This was a new figure, it was not wearing blue, but black and red. She was shortly backed-up by a blue figure. I hid my hands under my blanket. She didn't even look for them - she grabbed my head, put something wet and cold on it - moved it around, stuck something in and left. Finished. My head felt a bit funny, but I wasn't too sure if I had won or not. All this fighting made me tired, I slept. I only found out I lost when my parents returned and the room fell silent, my parents looked shocked and I heard my nurse say "sorry", a bit late for that I thought.

I had lost. I mean look at me!? What a complete mess.

There are positives though, every cloud and all. Before I saw my reflection, I didn't actually know I had anything on my head, I did feel something when the nurses were here, but after that I couldn't be too sure what that was. My Dad likes it because he knows I can't grab hold of it and try to pull it out and it does allow me to keep my hands free to suck and move around.

What they didn't remember is that I can still grab hold of my feeding tube (the one stuck to my face and up my nose), especially now I have nothing attached to my hands. I have learnt a great counter-attack for when my parents are changing my nappy. This involves shrieking and crying, whilst flailing my arms around the place - if this doesn't stop them I simply flail my arm onto my pipe, close my grip and PULL! If I can do this before my Dad grabs my hand I can successfully pull out the entire tube. It hurts like mad to get it pulled out and it hurts even more to get it re-inserted but, I feel that I'm scoring points. Since this there has been a introduction of white things on the end of my hands.  I think these have just taken my fingers away and replaced them with something soft and warm. I can no longer grab at things or scratch myself, and to be honest - but don't tell anybody, they are actually pretty nice.

Felix
x

Comment from DAD - However alarming some of these pictures look Felix is doing amazing. The reason he has his cannula inserted into his head is because his veins have all been used before, making it difficult and dangerous to try and force it. He also (fingers crossed) will only need this in his head for 3 more days, until the end of his antibiotics. His infection has almost dissapeared from his body. His CRP is now 32 which is a massive drop from its peak at 189. Once this is down to 4 he'll be free of infection. He has also started to do something else even more amazing but I will let him tell you about that soon.

Thanks for all your lovely comments and well wishes.

Daddy Rob.

I'm my own doctor.

It's been a great few days over in my camp. I've been out for really long cuddles and have started feeling much better. Yesterday my eyes were open for hours and I found out some great news. My infection is starting to disappear. Remember that CRP thing I told you about? Well it was 175, but yesterday it had dropped down to 100! This was great news, so after a little contemplation, I decided that I no longer needed my antibiotics.

When no-one was looking I pulled the cannula out of my wrist and just let the liquid from my feeds (glucose) and antibiotics drip onto my bed sheet. I think I did this at around lunch time and the nurses thought I had peed so much that I needed my bed-sheets changing. After a few hours of this, I started to get uncomfortable. My right hand was now soaked and my Dad thought it was because I had my hand so close to my mouth, but it was obviously all the liquid dripping into my plasters. Annoyingly, I haven't quite mastered how to control my hands so my face ended up cold and wet after too,

It was only when I was being cuddled at 9:00pm that my Mum spotted that my hand was still wet, even though it was no where near my mouth. I should mention that my Dad spotted that my cannula was loose, but Mummy just ignored him. The nurses told me off, but agreed that as I am growing so fast that I should be fine without my drip and they increased my feeds to 21ml.

What a result. My hands are now free, my feed tube is in my nose again and I am wearing clothes for the first time!

Felix 1 - Nurses 0.

(We haven't told Felix that he has to have his cannula re-inserted this afternoon for his antibiotics, sorry little man - Dad)

Don't strangle me! I'm sorry!!!

Happy Father's Day!

Well my first collaboration with another human being was successful. Yesterday, I managed to make a card for my Dad and passed it to my Mum so he could have a surprise when he woke up in the morning. I made it from a paper bag which the Nurses use as a waste bag for my incubator.  The card, I heard, was a huge success and my Dad was over the moon.

 
But this wasn't the end to my surprise.

Yesterday I overheard my parents talking outside my incubator. Dad whispered "Do you know what the best Father's Day present would be? For Felix to be taken off his ventilator" Mum nodded her head in agreement and added "and a poo". Well, those two things were certainly achievable if enough effort was put into them, besides I was kind of getting tired of having this ugly ventilator on my face. Like a Buddha, I concentrated hard on my breathing. In, out, in out. Until I was breathing without thinking. Just as I had planned the Doctors noticed my monitors and nodded in agreement. "Remove the Ventilator" they said.

Free face. Happy Dad. Did I ever tell you how handsome I look without anything attached to my face? Well, sadly you'll have to wait a little longer. In exchange for The Ventilator, I was given The Elephant Trunk (or CPAP as the big people call it). I can't tell you if it makes me look good, but BOY is it uncomfortable.

In the morning, I felt the Nurse change my nappy. She had a funny look on her face and started to wear plastic gloves. When my parents arrived they were VERY excited to see my Elephant Nose. Then I heard the Nurse say "He's just done a poo!".....Que predictable Daddy Dance! Boy was he happy, he even kept on interrupting the Doctors on their daily rounds with proud father sentiments "That's my boy! We asked for this and he gave us it" The doctors played along nicely with him.

In the afternoon I got the results back for my infection. Not sure if I have mentioned this before, but healthy babies have a CRP of 4 - mine skyrocketed to 189 before reducing down to 163. Today, it seems - probably after all this Father Day shenanigans, it's gone up again. This wasn't planned and it made my parents upset again and that makes me upset. So I cried. My parents like hearing me cry and I know they haven't heard me for a week, so it made them smile.

I'm now resting on my belly, Elephant Trunk on my nose and bubbling foam out of my mouth. I am super comfortable and look amazing (or so everyone says)

Happy Fathers Day!

Felix
xx

Felix vs 'The Ventilator'

I've found it difficult to blog over the last few days. I am very tired and am having my ventilator doing a lot of the breathing for me. My ventilator and me have a definite 'love hate' relationship. When it's behaving, it helps me breathe and when I feel up to it I try to help the ventilator by breathing too. My parents like this because they can see red lines appear on the monitor which are my breaths, over the green lines which are the ventilators. The hard part is when I get a tickley chest. I can feel it bubble in my lungs which really upsets me. So, I strike. I refuse to breathe and as a result, my oxygen levels and heart rate drop. I set the alarms off and get some one-to-one attention with the nurses. The nurses always say "come on cheeky" and then places a suction tube down into my lungs to remove some secretions. With these removed I 'drop' a few times again but then forgive the ventilator and continue letting it breathe for me. Sometimes the doctors make the ventilator do lots of work for me, I like this -  but know it isn't good in the long term. Other times, they try to make the ventilator not help me too much, but I don't like this and I let everybody know in the only way I can. Strike!

The reason all this has started to happen to me is because I have picked up an infection. This appeared the day after I had my 'long line' put in. I have been told I am small (compared to you lot yes!) and because of this I'm not very good at fighting these bugs which live on all you big people. I've learnt lots of new words over the last week and I know that my CRP should be 4, but it went up to 189. After being given some very strong antibiotics it's started to slowly go back down and is now at 179. I'll be better again when it's back to 4.

However dramatic this all sounds, the real reason I haven't blogged much is because I now have both my hands trapped by stupid splints. In one hand I have a line feeding me antibiotics and the other I have all my sugary food. Sometimes I try to break free! but punch myself in the face.

I know my Mummy and Daddy have been worried recently because I always see them hugging each other (eeew) but they still sing songs to me, they read me books and talk to me all day. I can nearly remember all of the story 'Quacky Quack Quack' and love hearing the song 'On top of Spaghetti', as well as lots of funny Thai songs my Mummy used to sing to me when I was in her tummy.

My Dad said he's made a little page on this blog so people can read all about the stuff the doctors talk about. You can find that here -Medical Info

I have to go now, my parents will be here to visit me anytime now to read me my bedtime story. 

Night night,

Felix! x